


The One And Only

by Kiramiel



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: A Killua who accepts his family, A sociopath Killua, Blood and Gore, Dark!Killua, Gon is oblivious, HisoIlluKillu, Hisoka is amused, Illukillu, Illumi loves killua too, Incest, Killua actually likes being an assasin, Killua loves his older brother, M/M, Multi, Posessive Illumi, Posessive Killua, Sex, Sibling Incest, Unhealthy Relationships, hisoillu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:55:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25963204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiramiel/pseuds/Kiramiel
Summary: Killua leaves the house for some entertainment but plans on returning to his dear older brother Illumi. He decides to take the hunter exam and it snowballs down from there.Or a little darker Killua who fully accepts his role as an assassin and loves his older brother. Maybe even a little too much.
Relationships: Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck/Killua Zoldyck, Illumi Zoldyck/Killua Zoldyck
Comments: 24
Kudos: 155





	1. The Hunter Exam.

Killua watched the door of the elevator open. He is greeted to the sight of dozens of people standing in tense silence in some kind of massive tunnel. Some of the more brave contestants are making small talk, but most people stay silent. 

Killua scans the room with sharp eyes and files it in the back of his mind. A man is already handing him his number and telling him not to lose it. Killua took his number and stuck it to his shirt. He made a beeline for the wall and sat down with his back against it, not wanting to be in the middle of such nervous energy.

Killua barely kept his lip from curling, and these are the potential hunters? They are falling to such thing as nerves and are so incompetent as to show it? Do they have no control? If these are the potential hunters, then he is not sure if this would be as entertaining as he thought. 

Killua sighed soundlessly. When he ran away from home to wander and see the world, he wasn’t sure where to start. After all, if you only come out of the house on assassination missions you wouldn’t really know where to find entertainment without resetting to killing. And since he could kill all he wants without leaving the house he decided to do something less… extreme and find some fun like an ordinary person. No matter how ridiculous the idea of a professional assassin acting like a normal person sounded. Killua looked around some cities for a while before finally coming across one of the examiners for this year’s hunter exam. She told him all about the exam, and the young Zoldik decided that he absolutely can not let this chance of entertainment pass him by. So now here he is, sitting in a room with about a hundred other people, waiting for the rest of the applicants to show up. 

-000-

Hours later, Killua heard the door to the elevator open once again and turned to look lazily at the newly arrived. Three people came out of the heavy doors, but the little boy around his age caught his attention immediately. His loud and excited demeanor coupled with his aura that practically screamed childlike innocence for those like him was interesting. 

It was just a small boy with spiky dark hair and a green outfit made out of simple shorts and a long-sleeved jacket. But that’s not what caught his attention. No, it was the aura the boy was exhibiting. 

Ever since he could remember, Killua was able to do things that were just unexplainable, like feeling other people’s aura. His, for example, was like freshly fallen snow, unblemished and pure. Although not in the way most people would think -- his aura is pure darkness that usually hides in the background of the perfectly crisp-white snow but is nevertheless always there. Killua used to be frightened of his darkness, fearing that someday it will burst out and take him over, eat him up, consume him until there was nothing left. Later, as time passed, he realized how hilariously wrong he had been, and learned not only to accept the darkness as a part of himself but embrace and flourish in it. The assassin fully accepted the darkness inside him and became a part of it, just like the darkness is now a vital part of him and who he is. 

The aura of this kid, though… it is so warm and bright as if it wants to compete with the sun itself. It is light and so very welcoming, pulling the unsuspecting to him like butterflies to honey. The kid himself seems to unknowingly exude a boyish charm that makes people turn their heads to look at him. His aura is so pure -- so much like his own yet so different at the same time... Even his appearance is exactly the opposite of the Zoldicks. Where Killuas aura is pure darkness and is cold and sharp and screams danger, but is covered with a deceptively silky exterior -- his is pure light and warmth like sunshine in the middle of the summer, bright and welcoming like the only fire in the middle of a cold night. Killua was elegant with his porcelain skin and silver locks. He was delicate and moved with almost unnatural grace and fluidity while his azure eyes always stayed as cold as ice. This boy, on the other hand, combined a surprising combination of natural grace and an absolute lack of poise in a single person. There was nothing elegant about him, with his dark hair, chocolate eyes, and sun-kissed skin. It was fascinating. 

But then he felt it coming from the other side of the tunnel. The bloodlust. So strong and wild, like a feral beast finally ripping out of the metal bars at the first smell of blood. Killua looked over sharply, suddenly on alert. There, standing in the middle of a clearing, stood a man with fiery red hair in a jester outfit, with a teardrop on one cheek and a star on the other. He was standing over a man whose arms suddenly started turning into beautiful scarlet butterflies while exuding the delicious killing intent. 

Killua felt a thrill run down his spine, and he licked his lips unconsciously, barely keeping hold of his own bloodlust wanting to rip free from the iron-clad control he always had it under. But no, he could not let it out this early in the exam. Killua wouldn’t want to show any of his cards this early in the game, where is the fun in that?

“Ah, you need to be more careful. When you bump into someone, you need to apologize.” The magician supplied helpfully, but before the young assassin could examine him more closely, Killua heard a loud noise, like two rocks rubbing against each other. A secret door opened, and in came a man with a mustache so big it covered his mouth entirely. He was probably their examiner.

“Hello, I am sorry for the delay. My name is Satotz, one of your examiners. I will lead you to the second exam.” Without another word, he turned around and started walking down the endless looking hall, seemingly expecting everyone to just do as they are ordered and follow him without questions, which they did. Slowly, Satots started increasing their pace until they were running after a dozen minutes.

Killua did not mind. He just took out his skateboard -- that he borrowed… permanently -- and skated after the examiner. 

Killua was just skating and mentally filing each contestant in a specific box in his mind based on how much problems they could potentially cause when they were interrupted by a loud voice:

“Hey, you!” Killua turned to see a man in a suit pointing a finger at him and yelling, “Show some respect to the exam!” He cocked his head to the side with an innocent expression, so the man continued and pointed at his skateboard, “That’s cheating! This is an endurance test, so you have to run like everybody else!” 

“No, it’s not.” A boy next to him interrupted, and Killua realized with a jolt that the sunshine boy he was so fascinated by was running next to this man and another boy a little older all this time. It’s a good wakeup call, he let his guard down for a minute, and people were able to sneak up on him. He will not make that mistake again. “Satotz just told us to follow him right, Leorio?” 

“Whose side are you on?!” The man, Leorio, exploded, and Killua smirked.

He jumped off his skateboard and picked it up, falling in line with the sunshine boy, “I guess I could run for a while. I’m Killua by the way.” He introduced, intentionally leaving out his last name, not wanting to scare off such interesting people right away. After all, the Zoldik name is renowned all around the world as a family of the best assassins in the world. Each member of the family has a flee on sight order. The sunshine just grinned at him innocently, not knowing what kind of monster he is talking to, “I’m Gon, and this is Kurapika and Leorio.” He introduced Kurapika as a feminine boy around sixteen years of age with shoulder-length blonde hair and azure eyes, wearing blue western clothing and Leorio as the brunette man yelling. 

The conversation after that flowed smoothly, with Gon doing most of the talking and Killua just listening and saying the right things at the appropriate time. After all, if Gon wanted to tell him all about how he got here, who is he to object? 

Suddenly Gon stopped and looked behind him, Killua following suite curiously. Leorio stopped running and was now breathing heavily with sweat pouring off him. “Hey, Gon, let’s go,” Killua said, but Gon just shook his head with a small concerned frown. “Argh! Screw this thing! I am going to become a hunter even if I have to run naked!” Leorio suddenly ripped off his shirt and sprinted forward with the energy probably even he did not know he had. Gon smiled brightly, happy for his friend, catching Leorios’ suitcase with his fishing rod, and went back to running while Killua just stared after Leorio with a raised eyebrow. 

“Hey, you want to race to the end?” Killua asked with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

“Whoever loses has to buy dinner!” Gon proclaimed and took off. Killua chuckled and ran after him.

Killua ended up intentionally bringing the race to a tie, wanting Gon to think of them as equals subconsciously. They eventually decided that they would buy each other’s lunches when Satots confirmed that they crossed the finish line simultaneously.

The tunnel ended in a literal swamp with very thick mist all around them.  
“Is this where the second part of the exam will be?!” One of the contestants yelled. Most people just barely made it to the end of the tunnel, and their number is considerably smaller. 

“No, we are not quite there yet. These are the Milsy Wetlands that we will have to cross but beware of the dangerous beasts that live in this area-” Satotz didn’t get a chance to finish and was interrupted.

“Don’t listen to him! He is not the examiner!” A beaten-up man came out of the forest, carrying a dead monkey that definitely shares the same stylist with Satotz, Killua thought, amused. “I am the real examiner!” He held up the monkey in his hands. “Look! These are the man-eating monkeys. They prey on fresh human flesh but are not strong enough to fight one on one, so they masquerade as humans and lead their unsuspecting victims into traps hidden in the thick mist!”

Killua saw Gon frown at the newcomer while the other contestants whispered amongst themselves and slowly started moving away from Satotz, who looked decidedly unimpressed with the whole situation. It seems like someone else’s patients also were wearing thin, and Killua felt something fly by him at an impressive speed. A couple of cards embedded themselves into the newcomer while Satotz caught the couple of cards aimed at him. Killua looked over at the jester, Hisoka, they called him, right? He smiled, playing with his cards. “Ahh, it’s settled then,” seeing the confused and openly shocked faces of most contestants he sighed and shook his head at their stupidity but continued, “The examiners are professional hunters chosen to be examiners for free. Therefore, there is very little chance a real examiner can miss such a simple attack.” And that was it. Simple and efficient. Killua has to give credit where credit is due, that was a great way to deal with a situation that had the potential to become quite tedious.  
Satotz, on the other hand, didn’t seem to agree, “I’m flattered by your belief in my abilities, however, refrain from attacking any more examiners in the future, or you will be disqualified.” He stated, looking straight at Hisoka. But Hisoka just smiled more and hummed something noncommittally. 

Eventually, the examiner ordered them to start moving and Killua looked over to Gon. “We should move to the front. Hisoka is going to stay at the back and might kill anyone who moves too slow and falls behind.” 

Gon looked over at where Leorio and Kurapika had fallen behind. “Hey! Leorio, Kurapika! Killua said we should move to the front!” Killua almost facepalmed, almost because assassins do not make such gestures. But the urge was great. Does this kid not know the meaning of discretion? “Quiet! Can’t you feel the tension around us?” He hissed like a disgruntled cat.

“Moron! If I had the strength, I’d already been there!” Leorio yelled, his pride wounded.

“Don’t worry about us!” Kurapika yelled back. 

Killua shrugged and turned to Gon, “Let’s go.”

“Oh, okay.” Gon looked worried but followed after Killua.

“By the way, how did you know what Hisoka is gonna do, Killua?” Gon asked after a minute, curious.

The youngest Zoldik looked at him and smirked a little crookedly, “Because I’m like him.”

“What!? Killua, no, you’re not!” But Killua just looked at him and shook his head, effectively closing the conversation.

-000-

Gon ended up worrying about Kurapika and Leorio throughout the run even when a man-eating frog almost ate him. Eventually, he noticed that he could not see the two of them anymore and went to investigate. Killua stayed back and kept running. He didn’t really care either way. If those two died in the first stage of the exam, then they were not as impressive as he thought. Especially Kurapika, there is something dark but fragile inside him. Like all his skin has been ripped off, exposing raw nerves and each spot is a sore spot. He explodes with little to no provocation and is unstable. As if a single trigger will pull him down into the abyss. It is interesting to watch how he tries to balance on the verge of insanity. Killua himself doesn’t even try to claim to be anywhere near psychologically stable, but he accepts all his quirks and is in full control of himself, unlike Kurapika.

Killua easily reached the phase two site with the other applicants but didn’t see Gon anywhere around.

Satotz was patiently checking his watch and waiting for the other competitors when Killua saw Hisoka coming out of the forest carrying Leorio's body that he put against a tree nearby. The magician looked over at him as if sensing Killua's eyes on him. Poisonous yellow eyes met clear blue ones, and Killua inclined his head slightly in gratitude, never breaking eye contact. He could practically feel this man's power and knew that he was outclassed, his instincts practically screamed dangerous, so there was no shame in showing some respect. He was not Gon to antagonize a stronger opponent after all. Hisoka smirked playfully, clearly amused, and waved a hand before walking off. A couple of minutes later Gon came back, claiming that he tracked the smell of Leoririos cologne, and the Second stage started soon after.

“Excellent work, everyone,” Satotz said. “Phase two of the Hunter exam will occur here, in Biska Forest Park. So I shall take my leave. Best of luck to all of you, you will certainly need it,” He ended a little ominously and walked back into the forest. The large gate opened, revealing an ample space with little stations set up everywhere.

“All applicants who passed the first phase, please enter.” A female voice called from inside the gate. A woman with green hair sat comfortably on a couch with a large man behind her. She was wearing a very revealing fishnet top and short shorts. Killua just looked at her, not even the slightest bit affected while some other contestants almost started drooling. “Welcome. I’m Menchi, the second phase examiner.”

“And I’m Buhara, the other examiner,” The large man behind her introduced.

-000-

The second phase ended up being a total mess. Killua did not even get a chance to fight and was becoming exceedingly more restless. Since their two examiners were Gourmet Hunters they expected the contestants to cook two dishes for them. The first one was pork, which they had to find in the forest. Killua went with his three new companions and they eventually found some pigs. Carnivorous pigs that proceeded to chase them from the moment they caught sight of the four of them. Thankfully Gon was able to find their weak spot before Killua turned the pig chasing him into ribbons in his frustration. And that would have resulted in a lot of blood, which was entirely too troublesome to get off clothes. And would probably scare off his new ‘friends’, he added as an afterthought. They were all able to bring the pigs back and roast them. Buhara ate every single pig brought to him, stupefying Kurapika with his ability to consume amounts greater than his weight.

But then Menchi told them to make sushi. Killua, not knowing what the hell sushi was, other than that it requires fish and rise based on the ingredients and the types of knives provided for them, turned to look around. Apparently, all the contestants had the same question: what the hell is sushi? 

No one passed the second stage of the exam. 

The outraged shouts of the competitors were quieted down by the appearance of the chairman of the selection committee, Netero. The person who was responsible for this year’s exam.

Netero ended up scolding Menchi like a troublesome child for not being fair. Menchi, ashamed, proposed redoing the second stage, and the chairman agreed on the condition that she also had to take the exam.

-000-

And now here they stand, on a mountain with a vast, steep canyon. 

“Now everyone, look down there,” Menchi pointed her manicured finger down. Below them was a huge collection of webs.

“What is that?” Someone called out from the crowd.

Killua, Gon, Kurapika, and Leorio were standing together and looking down with interest.

“This is a Spider Eagle’s web,” Menchi explained. “Look below the web.” There were quite a lot of eggs hanging by the webs. “Those are the Spider Eagle eggs.”

“Spider Eagles build their webs in deep canyons to protect them from predators,” Netero informed. “This makes them one of the most difficult to obtain. The eggs are also known as Dream Eggs.”

“W-Wait a minute… You don’t mean we…” One of the contestants stuttered. 

“I sure do,” Menchi smirked, before jumping into the deep canyon. She grabbed on to the web and waited for a bit of wind before jumping down and grabbing an egg.

“Hey… She jumped down!” Leorio exclaimed. “Is she trying to kill herself?!”

“No, she’s not,” Kurapika stated easily.

“Huh?”

A large updraft sent her flying back up.

Killua grinned, “That looks fun.”

“The ravine has updrafts that help hatched chicks fly up to the web,” Netero chuckled. 

“Y-You must be joking,” One of the contestants exclaimed. “No sane person would jump down there…” 

“I have been waiting for something like this!” Gon exclaimed happily. He, Killua, Kurapika, and Leorio were the first to jump.

“Wait, I haven’t finished explaining everything!” Menchi yelled, but everyone ignored her.

“Let’s go!” All who are willing quickly jumped into the ravine and grabbed onto the web. One person jumped without waiting for the wind and fell to his death.

“When is the next one?” Leorio asked impatiently. 

“Wait,” Gon said, staring down intently. Killua looked over at him curiously, wondering if he could feel the wind currents slowly building too.

The web was beginning to shake. “What’s going on?!” Leorio panicked.

“The web won’t hold all of us,” Kurapika explained a little nervously.

“That updraft better hurry or we are all going to go splat,” Killua commented offhandedly.

“You’ve got a morbid sense of humor, kid,” Leorio quipped.

“I wasn’t laughing… idiot,” Killua shot back.

“Oi!”

“Now!” Gon yelled, and they all released the web, caught their eggs, and the updraft blew them back up to the surface.

“Is that it? No one else?” Menchi asked the rest of the applicants who didn’t jump down and shrugged. “I guess you quit.”

“To accept your limits is no shame. You are welcome to take the exam another time.” Netero soothed.

Soon the eggs were boiled, and Menchi gave the lot of them chicken eggs to compare. Killua had to agree, these eggs are good.

“I can see why they are called Dream eggs,” Kurapika commented.

“As I hope you now know, not all treasures are jewels or metals, or artifacts! We, gourmet hunters, live for such hunts,” Menchi explained.

They were then ushered into the airship. Killua sighed, hoping the trip would not be too long, not wanting to get bored when something exciting just finally happened but followed nevertheless.


	2. The Airship

On the airship, all the remaining contestants were led into a large room that was easily able to fit the thirty or so people. Netero went up to the front, and Killua inspected him carefully. When he was distracted by the exam, he was not able to put much thought into it, but now he had a perfect chance to analyze this interesting phenomenon standing in front of him. The old man was barely exuding any aura. And even the amount that was leaking out was so minuscule that only now when Killua was relatively close to Netero, he was able to feel the steely air surrounding him. Yet all Killuas’ instincts screamed that this man was dangerous, incredibly so. And he was trained to trust in his instincts. This means that either aura has nothing to do with strength (which is quite frankly ridiculous and has about one percent chance of being true) or Netero was able to hide his aura somehow (which was most likely). For now, Killua was going with the second option since it made the most sense and didn’t break his world view. The question now is: could Killua do it too? Killua is able to control his aura to a certain extent, which wasn’t much in his opinion since most of his results came from trial and error, but… 

Before Killua could think anymore on that topic, Netero started speaking, “Allow me to introduce myself properly. I am Netero, and I’m the Chairman of this year’s Hunter Exam Selection Committee,” Netero said. 

“And I am his assistant, Beans,” A little man that looked more like a green blob piped in. 

“Originally, I had planned to make my appearance during the final phase, but as I am already here…“ Netero explained. He looked at all the applicants, and the atmosphere turned heavy. “I love this tension in the air! So I think I will stick around for the rest of the trip.”

“We are scheduled to arrive at our destination tomorrow at around eight AM. Until you are notified, you are free to relax and do as you please. Also, you will find dinner waiting in the dining hall,” Binns informed.

Soon after, they were left to do as they pleased for the rest of the night, Kurapika and Leorio immediately went to find a place to catch some sleep. But since neither Gon nor Killua were the least bit tired, they decided to explore the ship. 

Killua brought them to the kitchens almost immediately, sensing the smell of food like a genuine feline. The people there were not as compliant as the servants at the Zoldyck mansion, though.

“Hey, you kids! Stay out of the kitchen! Go eat in the dining room!” The cook yelled, throwing both of them out of the kitchen door. Killua narrowed his eyes at it. If something like that happened in his house, the cook responsible would have already lost his head. Or his heart. Or would have ended up with a broken neck. Either way, the point is that he would be dead, probably by Killuas’ hand. And when his parents eventually found out that they needed to hire another cook, they would have just slapped his hands and scolded him about wasting human resources. 

“Awww…” Gon wined, breaking Killua out of his slightly homicidal thoughts, “I wanted to get something to eat without going in that fancy place!”

Killua then smirked like the cat that caught the canary and pulled out a bag of candy he was able to snatch before they were noticed and shook it in front of Gon. Gon brightened up. “Wow, Killua! I haven’t even thought about that!” Then he grinned at Killua, and Killua tried not to go blind from the brightness. 

They ended up exploring the ship until the bad of candy was empty, and it was dark outside.

They were passing by the windows when Gon exclaimed, “Wow, awesome!” Something outside caught his attention.

“Hmm, what is it?” Killua hummed and went to see what the fuss was about. 

Gon was staring out the window, mesmerized. Now that he looked, Killua could understand the appeal. To someone who grew up on a relatively isolated island like Gon, the view would be amazing. It was already late, and the darkness took its hold, but the lights of the city still shine bright as ever. Killua looked on impassively but plastered a small smile on his face for Gons’ sake, not wanting to break the atmosphere. As someone who lives on a mountain and mostly worked at night in the cities when the missions required it, the view wasn’t anything special. 

After a moment of basking in the night sky and the lights above, Gon changed the subject. “Say, Killua…“ Gon began.

“Hm…“ Killua hummed questioningly.

“Where are your mom and dad?” Killua raised a brow at the seemingly random question but supposed that now is as good time as any to tell him. He did not tell him when they first met because he did not want Gon to be on guard around him. But now that he formed an opinion on him without any preconceptions filling his mind, it would not do too much harm to tell him about his family.

“They’re alive. Probably,” You never know in their line of work.

‘Probably?’ Gon thought but decided not to ask. “What do they do?” He inquired instead. 

“They are assassins,” Killua said as if it was normal, observing Gons’ face for any reaction.

“Both of them?”

Killua could not help it; he laughed. He laughed like he did not for a while. “That's your first reaction? You are the first person who even took me seriously!” He said after he controlled his giggles. But Gon just shrugged and looked away sheepishly, so Killua decided to continue.

“I am from a family of assassins. The Zoldycks,” Not seeing any recognition, he almost raised an eyebrow before remembering a second later where Gon came from, Right, island. So he explained, “The Zoldycks are considered the family of best assassins on the continents. And since I was named heir when it became clear that I had the most potential, that meant fewer missions outside the house and more training. A lot more training,” He said with an inward wince, remembering the Zoldyck Training From Hell that he had to go through. He paused for a moment, deciding what to say next, “So I ran away. Not forever mind you, but for a year or two. Just to see the world a little and maybe have some fun.” He waved his hand around him as if proving his point since he did come here to have fun.

Suddenly the two felt murderous aura from their left, but when they turned to see who it was, no one was there. Killua, with his sharpened sense, was barely able to track the owner of the aura moving from one side of the corridor to the other fast enough to see Netero coming out. “What's up, boys?” He asked, and Killua could see the amusement in his eyes.

“Did you see anyone down that way?” Gon asked innocently, pointing to his left.

“Mm… No, I didn’t,” Netero said.

“You sure are fast for an old man,” Killua remarked.

“That little trick, I barely moved,” He shot back, and Killua inwardly glared. On the outside, he was remaining disinterested.

“What do you want? You don’t have anything to do until the last trial right?” Killua asked neutrally.

“Now, now… No need to be so unkind,” Netero chastised. “I got bored and was looking for some companions. Mm… You two are the youngest rookies. What do you think of the trials so far?”

“Oh, the exam? It’s fun! Lots of action and no writing! I was worried about that,” Gon grinned, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I’m a little disappointed,” Killua stated. They didn’t even let him kill anyone, he thought sourly. He was growing more restless by the hour. This is the first time in years since he went so long without a proper fight. “Any chance of the next trial being more entertaining?”

“Well, I would not know about that,” Netero shook his head.

“Let’s go, Gon. That basically means no,” Killua sighed.

“Hey, weight a moment. Would you like to play a game?” Netero asked suddenly.

“A game?” Gon perked up.

“You two are against me. If you defeat me, I’ll issue your licenses on the spot.”

“Really? I’ll play!” Gon exclaimed, jumping at Netero’s offer. Killua sighed again but went along with it, seeing Gon’s blinding enthusiasm.

Netero then led them to a room within the airship and bounced a ball on the ground.

“Simple rules. Take this ball away from me before the ship reaches its destination. Use any tactics you like. I will only defend myself and the ball,” Netero explained.

“Huh? That’s too easy. You can’t call that a game,” Gon said. 

“Why not give it a try first?” The old man taunted.

“We just have to take the ball?” Killua titles his head to the side like a cat. Netero nodded. “Then I will go first.” Killua straightened a little, and his eyes narrowed, eyeing his opponent carefully. 

-000-

Netero noticed the changes in the little Zoldyck almost immediately. At first, he just wanted to test the kids, see what potential they had. Especially the one named Gon. Killua until now, however you looked at him seemed… normal. No, from what little Netero saw, he was undoubtedly talented, moved with cat-like grace to him, and certainly held himself with more confidence than most insecure teenagers. However, other than that and his unmistakable heritage, which showed in his looks, Killua Zoldik acted like a typical kid.

But now, seeing the kid straight up a little (and how did he manage it if his posture is always immaculate?) and focus, Netero could see why he was a Zoldyck. 

His body relaxed, locking like he was about to take a walk in a park, yet entirely ready to strike or defend if need be. His cat-like eyes narrowed slightly and became sharper, taking in and analyzing each detail. But what was more noticeable was the change in expression, it became colder, more analytical. Yet Netero knew it was just a little peek under his mask, that was crafted so beautifully that even he could not pick up on it without actually looking for it. And then he started walking, almost gliding around Netero, and the old chairman saw copies of the boy form as Killua circled him. He smirked, “Eh? That is an assassination technique, Rhythm Echo. You are not multiplying; it is just an afterimage.”

And then Killua struck with all the cold precision of a trained assassin. 

-000-

Killua sent out a couple of images for the ball to estimate the man’s reaction time and speed. The fact that Netero restricted himself to defense only would play into Killua’s hand this time. The only way to tell which was just an illusion and which was the original is to attack. Seeing as those are just illusions, the attack would go straight through, and the image would melt.

Netero was able to evade all of his attacks. He danced around Killua like his attacks were children play and not the moves of a professional assassin.

Then Killua finally attacked, aiming for one of the pore vulnerable spots in the human body, right around the neck. If you put pressure there just right, your opponent will go out like a light. Illumi taught him that after a particularly hard training session. 

But Netero was able to dodge his strike with practiced ease, only his eyes widened slightly for a millisecond at the burst of speed. Killua punched, kicked, jabbed, sliced, spun and twisted. If Killua was not going for the ball then he was aiming an extremely precise attack on the more vulnerable points of the human body, trying to fight his instincts and not go for the fatal ones. He used all his knowledge of anatomy that was drilled into his head to be able to fight like this. And yet this was his favorite fighting style out of a dozen or so that he knew. It relied on speed and precision and speed was always something he excelled at so the style fits him perfectly.

However, even with all his effort, he did not even scrape Netero once.

It went on like that for a couple of minutes before Killua took a deep breath and stomped on his pride before letting Gon finally take a turn, not wanting to get tired this early in the game.

Gon was not able to do much more than Killua, all of his attacks going in vain. And even when he tried using tricks, he was not able to make any progress.

And even working together, they weren’t any closer to getting the ball.

Finally, Killua had enough. This game was supposed to help him unwind and release the tension building in him from the lack of any real action for the last month. It had already been an hour, both Killua and Gon were sitting on the floor panting and sweating, although Killua considerably less so then Gon. Killua gracefully stood up from the floor, “Forget this… That’s it! You win! I give up.” With that, he headed toward the exit.

“Why are you quitting, Killua? We still have time, and we almost did it that one time!” Gon exclaimed.

“You really don’t have a clue, do you?” Killua sighed but explained, “He has barely used his right hand or left leg, yet we still could not get the ball.” He really did glare at Netero at that.

“Really?!” Gon yelled, the picture of absolute shock on his expressive face.

“You saw that, huh? I tried not to make it obvious,” Netero smiled teasingly.

“So, that's what he was doing." Gon said in realization.

"Well, you've had your fun. Let's go, Gon," Killua called.

"I think I'll keep at it." Gon said thoughtfully. 

"Didn't you hear a thing I said?! It's useless! Stupid! You'll never get that ball from him!" Killua exclaimed, exasperated.

"Sure," Gon said. "But there's still time for me to get him to use his right hand."

"I see..." Killua hummed. "Have fun, then. I'm hitting the hay”

Killua was walking down the hall, extremely frustrated. This game was supposed to help him unwind and release the tension building in his body from the lack of any real action for the last couple of days. Instead, he only felt tenser. Of course, he did not use anything even near his full abilities. After all, a good assassin never shows his full capabilities to another unless your target would not be able to blab after. Corpses can not talk after all, and a dead target is a good target. But even though he looked perfectly at ease on the outside, he was ready to rip someone to shreds.

Suddenly, two men walking down the hall and looking quiet drunk bumped into Killua. "Gross! He's all sweaty!" One of them, number three hundred ninety, said.

"Hey, where are your manners? You bumped into us so you have to apologize!" The other, three hundred ninety-one, sneered.

Killua merely ignored them.

"Hey!" Number three hundred ninety-one yelled, reaching out to Killua.

Suddenly, Killua was on the other side of the hall. Right behind the two drunken excuses for human beings. Then half of the number three hundred ninety-one’s head was sliced off, and the head of number three hundred ninety was falling soon after. Killua just continued walking as two bodies landed lifelessly on the floor behind him.

Killua felt something in him curl titer and purred contentedly. He, himself, wanted to purr like a contented cat when he felt the tension building in his body dissipate, and his shoulders relaxed. Killua felt a thrill run down his spine at the recent kill. It was a pleasure like no other. Yet, unlike some people, Killua can control his urge for blood, thanks to the Zoldyck Training From Hell. 

This situation just proved once again that he could not be an average person. Killua could not become just a teenager after everything he has gone through. 

He knew this, and yet he still tried to act ordinary. He even stopped killing after he ran away. And for the most part, Killua succeeded. 

But not for long. 

The tension building inside him with each day should have been his first clue. But Killua brushed it off. Thought it was just his body not being used to the lack of training. So he went on.

His sudden urge to participate in the hunter exam should have been his second clue. After all, why would he want to participate in a deadly exam where more than half the contestants died each year? Because he missed it. He missed the adrenaline pumping in his veins. Missed his mind working on overdrive in a life or death situation where the slightest mistake could cause you to lose a limb or even your life. And only after he felt himself finally relax after he killed for the first time in a month did he finally understand. He missed the rush of an accomplished mission, of another target eliminated.

Initially, Killua ran away from home because all he knew all his life was the life of an assassin. He did not mind his job but could not keep from wondering if maybe the life of a hunter or even just a normal person suited him better. If perhaps he would be happier doing something else. But he was proven wrong. And his Aniki, Illumi, has been once again proven right. 

Killua was a born assassin.

And he loved it.


	3. Chapter 3

After Killua was finally able to relax he went to one of the empty rooms that he spotted while he was exploring the airship with Gon. It wasn’t large and the lights were off. It appeared to be some kind of sitting room based on the comfortable-looking chairs and the coffee table he was able to see. 

Killua sat in one of the armchairs, instinctively positioning himself so he could see the whole room. His thoughts involuntarily drifted back to the two bodies he left in the hall, bleeding such pretty shade of crimson on the expensive carpet. Killua did not feel bad about his actions. Regret wasn’t something he felt often. Neither were a lot of things, actually. He’d always been a bit different from other people. Like how he got the feeling that, for most, it wasn’t harder to try not to kill people. But really, it wasn’t like he could help feeling as if certain people in the world didn’t really deserve to live. If people couldn’t be polite, useful, hard-working members of society, then wouldn’t society just be better off without them?

Killua knew he was a monster. Most monsters he met are born with the capacity of becoming a monster, but it was their experiences that shaped them into what they are today. They learn not to care, but Killua never had; he had simply been born this way-- smarter and stronger than other people, the only real person in a world of paper cut-outs. Other humans were meaningless, useful only in what they could do for him; what he could make them do. The power he’d had over others-- the power to hurt them, to make them suffer, the power to force them to do his bidding, being the hand that pulled their puppet strings, and the power to kill them, to snuff out their worthless existence-- had always been something capable of breaking the monotony. The world is a dull, grey thing that had always bored him in its predictability. Even training only added color to his life for so long, eventually, it just became another part of the grayed-out world.  
Even at home in the mansion, it was all grey walls and grey floors, and in the monochromatic space he was always surrounded in it was hard to see humans sometimes-- they just blended in. Grey, flat things that moved and made noise and danced along the periphery of his vision most of the time. Sometimes they got in the way. Sometimes animals and plants and rocks got in the way too. He did the same with the humans as he would a troublesome branch-- he moved it in the most efficient manner.

What felt like a lifetime ago, back when he was still practically an infant, he’d explained to a maid just once, before he knew better, that of course he could tell the difference between a human and a rock, he just didn’t see what the difference was in kicking a human and kicking a rock. What fundamental difference was there in breaking a stick and breaking an arm? Neither the rock nor the human mattered to him. Neither the branch nor the arm was a thing he cared about. Why did it matter that the body parts mattered to others? What did that have to do with him?

For Killua, most humans had been little more than objects in his eyes. There were precious few who he had viewed as actual people. There were only a finite number of humans who were not just black and white objects taking up space, like so many of the other things in the world. Those humans had sharp focus and full-color and actually managed to be people to him. Those humans, those swirling collections of color, stood out from the things and other objects as alive. It did not mean that he was not able to turn around and snap their necks, however. He has only met two colorful people that he would actually hesitate before killing. Gon was one of them, with his brightness and happiness, and his disgusting capacity to love. His innocence was unfaltering and his light steady even in the face of death. In this deadly competition where more than half would not return alive, he still managed to shine as bright as the sun. But sweet, innocent Gon has not earned himself more than a moment of hesitation before the final blow. Yes, Gon is bright and amusing but Killua could live without him. It would be a pity to lose such a willing source of entertainment but he would not give it more than a moment of thought. The other person, however… Killua was not sure if he could kill him without a serious reason even if he tried. His brother, his dear Aniki, was always so protective and caring with him in his own way. Most people would call Illumi a control freak with brother issues but Killua just called him a caring and protective older brother. Illumi was probably the most breathtakingly bright and colorful person Killua has ever seen in his life. He brought with him bright splashes of crimson where there had been only grey. He was so animated, so complex, and just so alive that it took Killuas breath away. And Illumi was his. His Aniki never looked at anyone like he looked at him. And a possessive, selfish part of him was immensely satisfied. Thinking about his older brother and how Killua really needed to see him soon or he would die of boredom he barely noticed how he fell asleep. 

When Killua dreamed, he dreamed of blood and sweat and tears, of painting the walls red and of the sheer exhilaration of being alive that only being inches from death could bring. 

-00-

“Attention! I apologize for the long weight. The airship will soon arrive at its destination.” Bean's voice rang through the intercom forcing Killua to switch from the state of blissful unconsciousness to sudden clear awareness in mere moments. Long honed instincts of an assassin making him stay relaxed and breathe deeply to keep the illusion of sleep while he surveyed his surroundings for threats in his immediate vicinity. When he found none, Killua allowed himself to open his eyes and breathe out slowly. 

After yesterday's revelations, Killua was more than ready for the next stage of the exam. So far, there was barely any bloodshed and what little there was came from the contestants themselves. Specifically him and Hisoka. Killua didn’t believe that the hunter exam will continue to be so… plain. As far as he knows they still have two to three stages left and Killua hoped he would be able to have some fun or he would have to go in search of it on his own and that would not end well for most contestants, not that he cared. But his specific type of fun would probably scare Gon off, which at this point would not be pleasant without his Aniki around.

Killua sighed again and stood up to exit the airship. It seems that they landed on the roof of an extremely tall tower, confusing many other applicants. 

“Where are we?”

“This is the middle of nowhere.”

“Wonder what’s gonna happen?”

Killua jumped off the airship, landing gracefully next to the other contestants when he heard Binns' voice, amplified for all of them to hear. “Ahem… Everyone, the exam’s third phase will begin here, at the top of Trick Tower,” Binns said. “To pass this phase you must reach the base of the tower alive. The time limit is seventy-two hours. We will now begin the Third Phase of the Hunter exam. I’ll pray for your success,” Binns announced before leaving the contestants to their task. Killua walked over to where Gon and his little group were standing together. 

Gon looked down at the bottom of the tower and was amazed by its height. “Are we supposed to climb down?” Leorio wondered. He and Kurapika admittedly looked better after they got a chance to rest. The exam apparently was more stressful for them. Honestly, sometimes Killua forgot just how fragile humans really are. “That would be suicide,” Kurapika commented. 

A slightly bulky man, number eighty-six, chuckled, listening to their conversation. “Maybe for a normal person. But a top-class rock-climber can handle this, no problem,” he boasted before taking out his equipment and starting climbing down the wall while Killua tried to wrap his brain around his utter idiocy. Gon didn’t seem to share his opinion, noting that the man was going down pretty fast. 

“He is going to die,” Killua could not help but comment.

“How can you just say something like that?!” Leorio yelled incredulously and maybe slightly angry. Killua just stared at him blankly for a moment, not understanding the problem. It was true, wasn’t it? Then what was the matter? But then the realization hit him and his eyes widened slightly. For a moment, Killua forgot how most people reacted to death. Killua himself has been surrounded by death since the day he was born. Talk about recent and future assassinations, training to become a professional killer, and the knowledge that for almost ten years of his life even a simple cook was able to easily snap his neck-- they are servants of the Zoldyck house, how could they not?-- was always around him. And at the time, he considered it normal. Only when he was able to go on his first couple of missions with the careful supervision of his older brother did he understand how fundamentally different he was from other people. When Killua thought about it, it’s not very surprising that he turned out to be a psychopath. He might not even have been born this way. 

When Killua realized for the first time how fundamentally different he was from other people, when he was finally able to understand why the people around him seemed so dull and bleak compared to him or Illumi, who was the only color in his monochrome world, he went to investigate in the library. What he found cleared a lot of his questions and brought more. There he found about the existence of psychopaths and sociopaths in the world. The former being a personality disorder characterized by persistent antisocial behavior and impaired empathy and remorse. While the latter was a personality disorder manifesting itself in extreme antisocial attitudes and behavior and a lack of conscience. The two greatest differences between the two are that psychopaths are born while sociopaths are made and are also able to feel remorse and regret even if it is dulled. It was possible for a child to become a sociopath if they were not exposed to emotions during their infancy. During the first couple of months, a newborn learns how to express emotions on an instinctual level, mostly by mimicking their parents. So if a child is not able to learn about their feelings during infancy they would not be able to in the future either, it would be too late. To Killua, it made perfect sense to be either one or the other. He didn’t know which exactly, though he had his suspicions. Something told him that he always was different.

His family never questioned his blank face or the too cold eyes, assuming it was the influence of his training, sometimes complimenting him on being able to hide his emotions so well. What they didn’t know was that it was not a well-crafted mask of a boy trying to copy his parents, nor was it the result of training. There was just nothing to hide in the first place. Unlike the rest of the Zoldycks who were able to put their emotions aside to a certain extent, some better than others, Killua did not have much in the first place. Only the disturbing emptiness that only his favorite brother was able to fill with his streaks of bright crimson.

Killua told no one about his discovery, no one but Illumi of course. It was just so natural to tell his older brother everything that he hasn’t even considered not telling Illumi. His brother listened to him silently, like he always did, and decided to take him to a psychologist for a professional verdict. Killua went willingly, honestly curious about the outcome. The doctor confirmed what Killua had already suspected, he was officially a psychopath. After that, Killua half expected Illumi to at least distance himself from him, at most kill him then and there as a threat for the Zoldyck family. As far as he knew normal people would feel at least unnerved when they realize the person in front of them is unable to feel remorse or regret or even understand the difference between breaking a stick and killing a person. But he should have known better, Illumi was not normal and never would be. After all, they come from a family of professional assassins. If anything, Illumi saw it as an opportunity for Killua to become great, to not be hindered by something like emotions or god forbid, friends. 

During their next training session, Illumi brought him out in the city to just watch the people. Watch how they interact and how they react in different situations. Illumi himself wasn’t able to teach him this lesson since he was also somewhat of a sociopath. He had feelings, even if they never showed on his face, but they were muted. Unlike Killua, Illumi was made into what he was now by the constant pressure to be perfect by their parents. So Killua watched and listened, later trying to mimic what he saw, with Illumi pointing out his mistakes. He was forced to practice until every expression on his face seemed genuine, until every bit of the emptiness inside him was carefully tucked away covered by a beautifully crafted mask, until he could slide expressions over his face like water in a seemingly natural way. And it worked, he was now able to fake almost any emotion, even if he could begrudgingly admit that he still struggled to understand more than half of them.

The voice of the self-proclaimed top-class rock-climber brought Killua out of his thoughts and back to the present where number eighty-six looked way to smug for someone who is about to die. And sure enough, after blabbering something about being the first contestant to pass the third phase he finally heard the flapping of wings nearing him. Before he could even turn to look around, a huge bird flew down and swallowed him whole.

Leorio gaped, his face twisting with horror and slight disgust. Killua just smirked, slightly amused. “Told you,” he said smugly and Leorio growled at him, “So I guess that means no climbing down?” He continued, completely ignoring Leorio.

After a while of trying to find a way inside the tower, Kurapika noticed the number of applicants among them begin to dwindle, “There are fewer people around,” he noted. 

“What?” Leorio looked around confused. Killua rolled his eyes internally at his lack of any special awareness. 

“I count twenty-three, which suggests almost half of the applicants have already found an entrance,” Kurapica calculated. 

“No way, when did they do that?” Leorio asked.

“That must mean that there are some hidden doors that lead below,” Kurapika explained. 

“Leorio! Kurapika!” Gon called.

“What is it?” Kurapica asked, walking over to the two kids.

“Gon found a hidden door,” Killua explained immediately. And the fact that he was standing around it the last five minutes had nothing to do with it, absolutely nothing.

“Alright! Good job, Gon!” Leorio praised, getting excited, “Let's head on down!”

But then Gon pointed out another five hidden doors around them and they decided to jump down at the same time. After some rather dramatic farewells that Killua quite frankly found ridiculous, they all jumped down. 

Killua landed gracefully on his feet, lithe as a cat, and took stock of his surroundings immediately. He landed in a dark room. All walls made of rock. The only visible exits being the closed door and the trap door he fell down not a second ago. He noticed a small table with something on it but wasn’t able to see what it was before his other companions appeared the same way he did. Kurapika and Gon managed to stay on their feet, but Leorio fell in a heap on the floor. Kurapika looked around and smiled, “That was quite a brief farewell.” 

Gon was the first to walk over to the only thing in the room, a sign on the wall with a small table holding five watches. “The five of you must follow the will of the majority to reach the goal,” he read. 

“Five of us?” Leorio asked and Gon pointed to the five watches in front of them, “Look, there are five stopwatches.”

“There is an ‘O’ and an ‘X’ button on it,” Killua pointed out helpfully.

“Could it be that we won’t be able to leave this room until another person dropped in?” Kurapika wondered out loud. 

He was right, there were only for of them in the room and if they need five people they would have to wait. Killua was interrupted by a voice coming from above them. Most likely some sort of speaker. “That is correct! My name is Lippo. I am the prison warden here, as well as the third phase examiner. Multiple routes through this tower have been prepared. You have chosen the path of majority rule. Cooperation will be the key if you wish to clear this phase of the exam. One person’s selfish behavior could derail the whole group. And you can not start until you have five members. Best of luck gentlemen!” 

So they were in a prison, Killua thought. He wondered if they would have to fight the prisoners. He hoped so. He did not want to grow restless again. It was like an itch that can not be scratched, annoying, and uncomfortable. He was startled out of his thoughts when a person landed on the floor of their little room. It was an overweight man, with mousse brown hair and small round eyes, somehow reminding Killua of a rat. The Zoldyck studied the new addition with a sharp, calculating gaze. He watched the way he moved, the way he stood from where he fell on the floor, the way his eyes moved around the room, even the way he breathed. He watched and assessed this man in a couple of seconds, coming to a disappointing, yet not an unexpected conclusion. This was another paper cut out, another piece of grey senary, a sheep that followers the flock. Coming to this realization, Killua dismissed the man as unimportant, yet still kept an eye on him. The examiner said that even one person can undermine the whole group after all. When It is revealed that Gon knows him, his name is Tompa, and that he fancies himself a ‘rookie crusher’, Killua decided that this man has a high chance of not getting out of this tower alive. No one ever said that they have to get out of this tower with every member of their group intact so Killua doesn’t see a problem in eliminating this Tompa if he proves to be a problem. 

They eventually put on their watches and with Gon’s enthusiastic chattering went through a door that opened for them. They walked down the poor lit hallway for a dozen minuter and Killua was slowly getting bored. On missions, he could stay in one spot for hours, waiting for his target. Waiting was as much a part of assassination as was killing itself. An impatient assassin was a dead assassin. But this was different. This is not a mission, he doesn’t have a specific target, doesn’t really have a clear goal, just go down and don’t die. This was a deadly exam, it was said to be dangerous, it promised to be entertaining. And here Killua was, running, cooking, and trying to deal with his own restlessness. 

Killua knew he was whining, he knew and didn’t care because there was no aniki to bring color to this dull world, to show him that there is a chance for humanity yet. Reminding Killua with his very presence that there is something other than blood and death to live fore. Only now, when he got to experience first hand how unbearable it is to be away from Illumi did he finally understand how utterly dependant he was on his older brother. When he was at home, it wasn’t as noticeable since Illumi spent most of his free time to train him as his official trainer. Most of his brother’s missions never took longer than a week and they went on most of them together as a way for Killua to gain experience under supervision. That meant this was really the first time Killua was away from his brother for so long and was finally able to understand just how much he needed Illumi. Any other person would probably be disturbed if not outright terrified by this revelation. Being so dependent on a person required a tremendous amount of trust. Trust that this person will not abuse the power he held over you. But Killua was not scared, it was quite rare for him to be scared at all really, he knew Illumi won’t harm him because he was just as tied to Killua as Killua was to him. It was a two-way thing and Killua knew, just like he knew he would never be able to harm Illumi, that Illumi would never be able to harm him. Damn, he wanted to see his Aniki. 

He was forcibly brought out of his thoughts when all of them came to a dead-end, with an option to go either left or right. It was a majority vote, and while everyone tried to outsmart the examiners, Killua just pressed a random button on his watch, not really caring which way they go, (although he hoped it was the more dangerous one, maybe he would be able to stretch his limbs a little.) The next time they had to choose which way to go, they all agreed to go to the right. Tompa, however, didn’t seem to get the memo and pressed the wrong button. Leorio exploded in rage and indignation, Kurapika frowned, but Gon just grinned and said that it doesn't matter as long as the rest of them agree on one route. Killua watched the interaction thoughtfully but decided not to comment. His number one go-to solution to any problem was to eliminate the source of the problem. No source, no problem. In this case, he would have suggested just killing Tompa and taking his watch. Nowhere in the rules did it say that every member of their group had to stay alive. But even though it was the logical thing to do in his opinion -- even he, with his limited understanding of emotion in general, understood that in his current company such actions would be... not well received. Killua grimaced internally, sometimes he hated having to deal with other people's emotions, he could not even start to understand half of them for god's sake!

And it went on like that for what seemed like an eternity, with them choosing various paths and idly avoiding all the traps that wanted to kill them. Tompa was continuously trying and failing to sabotage them and the only thing keeping Killua from homicide was the mildly amusing fights between the rest of the group where Leorio kept trying to punch Tompa in the face, Kurapika progressively getting tenser and tenser in anger, and Gon feudally trying to dissolve the tension. Killua just watched from the sidelines, slightly entertained. The only thing he needed was popcorn and he would be set. 

Eventually, though, the tunnel led them to a huge room. There was a stage below them, with a ditch surrounding it. Killua had no doubts that falling in it was deadly. There was another tunnel on the opposite side of the room and he looked into it, trying to see what lays beyond the darkness. Slowly, five people came out. All of them were wearing robes, hoods covered their faces and metal handcuffs bound their wrists. They were obviously the prisoners of this tower.

One of them took a step forward and his handcuffs fell off. Not wasting any time, he immediately took his robes off, revealing a bald head with an array of hideous scars. By that time everyone was watching and Leorio gasped at the sight. Killua grimaced, scars in his opinion are the sign of weakness for a professional. If you are truly skillful, no one would be able to get close enough to leave you a scar in the first place. Killua’s skin remained unblemished and silky even after his hellish training and countless missions. 

“We were hired to test you,” the man rasped as if his voice hasn’t been used for a long time, “here you must fight us.”

“These people look serious,” Gon noted, successfully breaking the slowly rising tension. 

“That’s why I said we had to go left,” Leorio grumbled.

“For all we know the left route would have been even worse,” Kurapika retorted. 

The prisoner, however, did not pause his speech to give them time to talk and continued as if nothing happened, “One on one fights. Each person can only fight once. The order doesn’t matter. You guys use the majority rule, which means if you win three times, you pass. The way you fight is irrelevant. If one gives up, the other wins. If one dies, the other wins. Now vote to either accept the challenge or not.”

Killua licked his lips discreetly and forced his bloodlust under control. Finally, finally, he was able to fight. And it only took three phases of the most dangerous exam in the world, he thought sarcastically but willed his expression to remain calm. 

Unsurprisingly, everyone, even Tompa after a particularly vicious glare from Leorio, decided to accept the challenge. The real question was: who is going first? After some arguing, it was decided that Tompa was to be first to, as he said, ‘see what they’re up against’. But it seemed they got their hopes up way too fast and the man forfeited the moment the match started. Killua honestly expected something like that but it still made his wish to kill the waste of space grow exponentially. 

Gon decided to go next and his match took a very unexpected turn. If Killua was expecting a fight then he was sorely disappointed. Apparently, Gon’s opponent was not very keen on physical fights and proposed to settle their match differently and Gon, being the kind soul he was, agreed. The prisoner proposed a game and the twelve-year-old was given a choice between a long candle and a short one. He ended up choosing the long one. It soon began apparent that the candle was rigged and was burning at incredible speed. Gon, in a show of surprising wit and intelligence, put the candle on the ground, correctly assuming that the intense fire would not be put down by the breeze in the room and ran over to his opponent to blow out his candle. Gon, victorious and grinning like a loon returned to his friends. Killua idly wondered if there was anything in the world that could take that grin off his face. 

Kurapika went next and Killua didn't object, interested in seeing the blond's abilities. He hoped this match would be an actual fight. Really, what's wrong with a deadly exam if nothing remotely dangerous was happening? But it seemed like his hopes were not in vain and Kurapika’s match was a fight to the death (or until one of them forfeits, but those were minor details in Killua's opinion.) The recently released prisoner introduced himself as a member of the famous, or should he say infamous, Genei Ryodan, and claimed to have killed seventeen people. Killua resisted the urge to scoff, if this man was a member of the Phantom Troupe he would not have been in this prison in the first place. And he certainly would have a more impressive body count. Honestly, Killua had more blood on his hands at the age of six! Kurapika seemed to share his sentiment and his aura tipped over the edge, no longer balancing on the verge of darkness. Not fully, no, it was barely even noticeable at this point but it was more than enough for Killua to sense the way his aura became darker, more ominous, releasing mild killing intent. The blonde ran forward with impressive speed and punched the guy in the face as hard as he was currently capable. “Don’t even mention the Phantom Troupe in front of me,” he practically growled and spun on his heel in the direction of his companions. Killua raised an interested eyebrow when he glimpsed the glowing red eyes a second before they faded back to their usual blue. It seemed like Kurapika was one of the Kuruta, Killua heard that a clan of red eyes was wiped out by the Spiders and didn’t expect there to be survivors. Although he supposed it explained why the blond had such an explosive, borderline irrational reaction to the name of this specific criminal organization. Killua's trained mind came to that conclusion in mere moments and when Kurapika passed him to sit against a wall his attention was already on the body left lying on the stone floor face first. He was always extremely perceptive and so was able to pick up the subtle signs of breathing. The man was either unconscious or pretending to be. And since the fight was not finished until your opponent either forfeit or dies they have to either force him to wake up or kill him. Killua thought they should just kill him and be done with it. It seemed one of the prisoners had the same idea and voiced his thoughts. The assassin turned his head only to see Kurapika shaking his head firmly, “I won't kill a defenseless man.” Killua saw the look in his eye and the stubborn, almost mulish set to his jaw and resisted the urge to sigh. He truly did not see the problem in killing the man, but he supposed it was just another one of those things those pesky emotions prevented people from doing. Situations like this always reminded him of just how glad he was to be free from the chains of human morality. What was the point of limiting himself when there was a job to be done? But he digressed, right now he needed to find a way for them to win this round so he can win the next and finally move on, this was starting to get slightly annoying with all the standing around he has been doing. His mind worked a mile a minute, conjuring and discarding plans at incredible speeds but he always came to the same conclusion: the man needs to die. And since Kurapika refused to do the job the honor fell at his feet. Killua grinned, it wasn't the usual mischievous grin he showed to the world, it was a cold, bloodthirsty bearing of the teeth that sent a chill down the spine of anyone who saw it. Thankfully, everyone was too focused on the story of the fallen Kuruta clan Kurapira was weaving. This was something Killua could do, was practically born to do. Kill a target without anyone the wiser, even in a populated area. The only question remaining is what will be the cause of death? Killua looked around, he needed a way to kill from a distance without anyone the wiser. Other than using poison, there was only one other way he could do this right now. He spotted a pebble and picked it up weighing it in his hands. He tilted his head in the direction of his companions and saw them still engulfed in their conversation, he shifted his eyes to the other prisoners and saw them in a similar situation, quietly discussing something. He allowed a small satisfied smile to cross his lips before the pebble was sailing through the air with nothing but a flick of his wrist. It hit the man in the neck and the young assassin clearly heard a satisfying snap that went unheard by everyone but him before the pebble bounced away and innocently landed on the ground. He saw the man's breathing stop and suppressed the urge to smirk. When he turned around he realized that Gon, Leorio, and Kurapika were discussing what to do with the now-dead prisoner. Killua cleared his throat, gaining everyone's attention, and looked straight at the blond Kuruta, “Shouldn’t we check if the man is even alive yet? We might not even have to do anything.” Kurapika apparently got the hint by the way his eyes widened and he stiffened, standing from his spot on the ground and walking briskly towards the arena. No-one stopped him. The blonde reached out a shaky hand to check his opponent’s pulse and froze. He recovered quite quickly and cleared his throat, “He is dead,” and if his voice cracked a little no one commented. 

Killua just shook his head at such a dramatic reaction to something as simple and beautiful as death. He would never understand people. He watched as their second win was recorded on the screen. 

He heard Gon happily congratulating Kurapika on his win and smirked as the tension dissipated. Kurapika relaxed slightly and gave Gon a small, but grateful smile. 

“Hey, who wants to go next?” Gon asked, already buzzing with excitement. 

“I’ll go,” Killua stepped up before Leorio could. 

Gon looked over at him and grinned, seeming not to notice Leorio's disgruntled expression, “Good luck, Killua!” Killua threw them a smirk. He watched as a rather large man was released from his restraints. He took off his robe, his large muscles bulging, “They call me… Ripper Jones.”

“Jones…” Leorio's eyes widened, “Killua, no matter if you lose, just don’t fight this guy,” he said urgently.

“Jones,” Kurapika muttered uneasily, “I know that name, I heard it before.”

“Ripper Jones ranked first in the history of Sebas City as the most violent and insane killer,” Tompa elaborated. 

Killua hummed, his interest peaked, “And how many did he kill?”

“The problem is not how many he killed, but how,” Leorio warned, “his hands are covered in blood. The police found about one-hundred-forty-six people and none of them were found in one piece, they were all ripped into at least fifty pieces. That’s why he was named the merciless Ripper Jones.”

Killua observed as the man laid a hand on the corner of the wall and squeezed, breaking off a piece of the stone wall in the process. Killua watched, silently, as the so-called Ripper confidently strolled down to the arena with an anticipatory smirk and raised his hand, opened his palm, and released the sand that was once a part of a stone wall. 

“The strength of his hands is truly astonishing”, Kurapika remarked and Leorio nodded, “Now you understand? It’s bad to fight in the open with such a crazy killer. I am sure all of us can take the Hunter Exam next year, we will just give up the exam this year. Any objections?” But Killua was no longer listening, he took a confident step forward and gracefully made his way down to the arena. 

“Killua!” Came from a startled Gon and Leorio finally noticed the Zoldyck, “Hey, Killua! Stop! What the hell are you doing?!” Killua cut him off with a look, “Don't stop me. It’s not every day you meet someone so interesting. It’s my game.” 

Gon smiled uncertainly and stood in front of Leorio when he tried to stop Killua once again. He seemed to get his confidence back and smiled brightly, “Don’t worry, we should believe in Killua! For him, it’s just a game.” 

When Killua came to stand in front of his opponent, Jones spoke in a low, gravelly voice, “It was so long since the last time I ripped the flesh of a living person.” Killua hummed, “So it seems. How are we going to divide the win?” 

“A fight. Don’t make a mistake, right now we are going to start a death game. I am not interested in challenges and competitions. I only want to experience the magnificent feeling of tearing flesh.” He reached out his hand again and looked down at Killua with an anticipatory expression. Like he already won, like there was nothing Killua could possibly do, like he is just another victim. Killua felt his blood boil, normally he had excellent control over his emotions, but there were certain things that he did not tolerate, and the thing in front of him had just crossed the line. Until that moment, Killua was perfectly pleasant, if not a little playful. Now, however, the air around him changed, his expression lost all emotion and his blue eyes frosted over. When he spoke his voice came out flat, showing just how angry he was to anyone who knew him.

“To the death, huh?” And then he disappeared, only to reappear behind his opponent with a still pulsing muscle in one of his hands. Jones turned around on unsteady feet and reached his hand toward the heart still in Killua's hand. “That’s… mine” he didn’t get to say anything else before he fell to the ground, never to rise again. Killua, now considerably calmer, casually walked over to the man and put the heart in his still outstretched hand. The silence was deafening.

The young assassin turned to look over at his companions, wondering how Gon would react, only to see him staring in awe, with a smile so wide it must have hurt. Kurapika was shocked and Leorio was looking at Killua in horror. 

While he was making his way to them, Gon explained about Killua being a Zoldyck. “A descendant of a family of assassins?!” Tompa exclaimed and Killua nodded in confirmation, “The most famous family of assassins in the world.” He saw Leorio take a few cautious steps back and smirked in amusement.

“Killua? How did you do that?” Killua looked over at Kurapika, who was eyeing him uneasily. “I just ripped it out,” he stated, “Although I had to change the structure of my body slightly to make it easier,” he raised his hand and slowly turned it into a claw, his fingers and nails becoming longer, sharper, and a whole lot more dangerous. “You guys called him a killer but I think he was just an amateur. I am a professional assassin. But when it comes to the art, my father is a lot better. When he strikes, the enemy does not even lose a single drop of blood.” Now everyone, with the exception of Gon, looked uneasily. Killua paid them no mind, “Gon, let’s get out of here. We are on a time limit.” Gon grinned again and ran up to catch up with his friend.

Kurapika gazed at the boy who just casually murdered a man in front of them without so much as a blink and now laughed with his friend as if nothing unusual happened. Thankfully he is on our side, I’m not sure I want to know what happens to his enemies. 

The rest of the journey was uneventful, they evaded traps, solved riddles, and just fooled around. Killua tried not to dwell on the boredom, he was starting to regret his decision to leave home. Although, he looked over at Gon, I suppose meeting such an interesting person makes it worth it, if only slightly. Soon all of them were riding down a slide that brought them straight to the bottom of the tower. 

Killua looked around calmly, seeing that quite a lot of contestants were already here. He could see Hisoka creating a card tower somewhere in the corner. Seeing that they still had more than a day left they all decided to lay down and sleep for a while. Killua curled up in a ball next to Gon, now more than ever resembling a large cat. He hasn’t slept in a couple of days now so he might as well catch up on his rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait. But I made it up with the length of the chapter! It's like twice as long as the previous ones!
> 
> I know I am going through the exam pretty fast but don't worry, it's going to slow down slightly when after the hunter exam since that's when the real changes start. So far I am doing some character building, or more like character explaining in my opinion. I am just trying to separate the canon Killua from my Killua and explain why they are so different. This idea actually came to me after I read an especially great Harry Potter fanfic that had an absolutely amazing view on psychopaths! So then I thought, what if Killua was like that? How is his relationship with Illumi going to turn out? How is he going to handle his family? What's going to happen to his friendship with Gon. And one of the most important questions: how is our beloved psycho clown going to react? So I went on and wrote this! 
> 
> In my opinion, Illumi's love for his little brother is like the love Itachi felt for Sasuke. While Killua and Sasuke both loved and hated their brothers. That kind of love that can either build or destroy a person. In cannon, it destroyed. But what if Illumi's love was returned? So in my fic, it will build. 
> 
> The only thing I am still unsure about is the relationship between Hisoka and Illumi. I mean, I could make Hisoka focused solely on Gon and make it an eventual HisoGon, or I could make Gon just a passing interest and have Hisoka sincerely interested in Illumi but hiding it under the wish for simple fight. In that case, they would probably end up in a triad (Hisoka, Illumi, and Killua) since I can't imagine Illumi caring for someone more than his little brother. And my Killua is more likely to figure out a way to kill him before even looking at Hisoka if his older brother dismisses the magician. But then I can't see anything stopping Hisoka either so they would eventually end up in a triad. 
> 
> So I am asking you: What would you prefer? HisoGon, a relationship filled with sin and innocence. Or HisoIlluKillu a relationship made of obsession, blood, and death. 
> 
> I would honestly prefer the second but it is your choice! Make your choice and comment!!!


	4. Chapter 4.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Sorry for the late update, I was lost on the road of life! I had so many ideas I had to write down about other fandoms that I didn't have any time for this one. Right now I have a Hawks story started, an Edward Elric story started, and a Sasuke Uchiha story halfway planned out!!!!  
> I read all your comets and want to thank every single one of you who took the time to write something. Based on your responses I decided to go with HisoIlluKillu and I can already tell that it would be glorious. The most hilarious thing is that, with the way this story is going, Hisoka would end up being the most socially adjusted. I can practically see Hisoka sweatdropping at the two Zoldycks when their first response to a problem would be to incinerate it. The poor magician would be totally lost because it would be the first time people don't try to stop his violence but actively encourage it, in Killuas case. The scene of Hisoka explaining to the brothers why exactly murdering all your problems is not right with a strained look on his face while Killua looks at him with a confused expression and Illumi just stares blankly is burned into my brain.   
> I feel like I am leaving poor Gon out tell me guys what you think about him ending up with Aluka
> 
> One last thing: if you guys have ideas about how this story might go I would be ecstatic to read them. Sometimes I feel like my imagination isn't enough and I would be happy to write some of your ideas. It would also be nice to have an outside perspective since I have no beta. 
> 
> Well, thanks for reading and have fun!
> 
> Tell me what you think in the comments!

Killua woke up abruptly when he felt someone getting way too close to him for comfort. His first thought was of his brother, he was the only one in the house that was brave or skilled enough to approach him while he slept, but no, the aura wasn’t anything like Illumi. It was distinctly familiar, but not enough so that his sleepy ming registered it as unthreatening. He kept his body relaxed, his breathing regulated to mimic the slow and deep rhythms of sleep. Tracking his target, he waited until they were leaning over and reaching to touch him before his arms snapped out, one grabbing the target’s wrist and twisting it into a painful lock, the other growing extremely sharp claws and wrapping around their throat. His eyes were still firmly shut. 

There was a muffled snort of amusement from farther away and Killua took a moment to remember where he was. Opening his eyes, he stared cooly into the shocked and wary face of Leorio. His gaze flickered to the side. Kurapika was standing a safe distance away with a hand over his mouth to cover his chuckles. It wasn’t particularly successful. 

“I’d recommend against doing that again, Leorio.” Killua’s voice was calm and quiet as if he wasn’t still holding a hand around a man’s throat. But then he suddenly grinned cheekily and released his hold, “You wouldn’t want to be cut into ribbons next time, now would you?”

Leorio paled and swallowed hard before shaking his head as if to clear it, “The next phase is starting,” he said, and scrambled away. Kurapika looked back at Killua to give him an amused smile before following Leorio. 

Killua glanced around, his eyes quickly taking, analyzing, and filing away information. Sure enough, the contestants were slowly standing up and strolling towards a now opened door. He sighed but followed nonetheless, wondering what the next task would be. The tower really got his hopes up. Maybe each task was harder than the previous one? That would certainly be great! 

After they were all escorted onto a ship, an examiner came to inform them of the fourth task. They were first told to take out a number from a bin. Killua did so when it was his turn and took his place at the back of the group. The examiner, seeing that everybody seemed to quiet down some, finally started talking. 

“In a couple of hours, this ship will arrive on a deserted island. You will stay on the said island for a full week, after which the survivors will be picked up by the association. The numbers you just pulled out serve to decide who will be hunting… and who will be hunted.” The three brothers standing to the side squeaked, looking uneasy. “The person with the same number tag as the one in your hands will be your target,” the people around immediately started taking off their numbers. Killua didn’t bother, he wasn’t going to hide, and he didn’t particularly care if people went after him, they would have to find him first. He chuckled quietly, let them try. His eyes glinted with sadistic amusement and his lips curved in anticipation before it was hidden, folded, and carefully tucked away from prying eyes, leaving behind a teasing smile on full, pouty lips, and a playful glimmer in azure eyes.

Unseen to Killua, dark, soulless eyes watched him impassively, the corner of the man's lips twitching up in a subtle smirk at the sight. 

“The goal of the exam is to acquire six points by the end of the week. Your own number costs three points, the number of your target is another three points, and the number of any other contestant costs one point each. And yes, that means you could lose both your own number and the number of your target and still pass if you manage to acquire six other tags.” 

One of the brothers let out a relieved sigh, “So we don’t have to kill anybody,” he muttered quietly, but the examiner didn’t spare him a glance and continued talking, immediately crushing any hope the brother had with his next words. “Of course, the manner in which you acquire the necessary amount of tags doesn’t matter. You could decide to steal the tag quietly, or you could kill your target and take the tag from their corpse.” With that said, the man turned to leave, not giving people the chance to ask questions or protest. The contestants were left to look around suspiciously, wondering who will be targeting them. 

Killua on the other hand, could not help but smile, he could practically feel his anticipation rising and he had to forcefully keep his heart rate from spending up, remaining calm and controlled. 

A hunt. And he was given free rein over his actions, too. That’s exactly what he needed. 

Everyone went their way after the examiner finished his speech and Killua decided to find his companions. He wanted to see Gon before they had to make their way to the island. As much as he wanted to complete this task with him and the others, Killua knew he couldn’t. He wanted to see how Gon adapted and fought for survival but that wasn’t a reason to scare him off with his ‘unsettling’ behavior during a hunt. Until now, Killua managed to keep his facade just about flawless and his heartbeat slow and steady, but the tension in his limbs was building with every hour that he spent in inaction. He knew he had to let go and soon, otherwise, he will end up doing something he might regret later. And he was given such a golden opportunity too. A whole island as his own personal playing ground. Wasn't that wonderful? The only thing that concerned him was the rare presence of another predator. And one outside his family, at that. The assassin wanted to fight, wanted to issue a challenge, but knew that he could not, at least not now. 

He supposed that it was his own fault, for becoming complacent, for growing arrogant, for not considering the fact that there could be other predators outside his immediate family. His isolation throughout his life was probably at fault for both his slight ignorance of the outside world and his complete lack of social skills. As was proven by Killua's conversations with Gon, if you could even call them that.

But other than the slight problem of Hisoka, he was free to roam the island and hunt his prey to his heart content. 

Maybe he could find Gon after he played a little? Yes, that would be for the best. If he could not take Gon with him, then he would just have to find his new companion later. 

Killua nodded to himself, a decision made. With that, he went on to look for the three most interesting people in this exam.

Gon wasn’t hard to find, he was talking to Kurapika and Leorio. He seemed a little down somehow. Concerned, if not outright worried. Killua frowned, that was certainly a first. Before this, no matter what trial lay ahead, Gon always welcomed it head-on with a bright smile on his lips and determination in his eyes.

Killua moved quietly, feet silent on the floor. A walk of a predator that the assassin was not able to change too much even if he wanted to. He crept up behind Gon, giving the other two a signal to be quiet, and taped the green-haired boy on the shoulder with a quiet ‘boo’ in his ear. Gon jumped a couple of feet in the air and turned around with a startled yelp. Killua watched as his shocked expression became indignant when Gon saw him snickering. Killua couldn’t help it, he burst out laughing and could hear Gon follow him soon after. 

When Killua finally got his composure back and wiped his tears, he looked over at his… friend? He was smiling brightly, occasionally letting out soft giggles. 

The assassin smirked, “So, what’s with the doom and gloom atmosphere? What could have happened in the ten minutes I didn’t see you that got you so down? You looked like someone kicked your puppy or something,” he said teasingly. 

Killua stood there, trying to conceal his slight awkwardness. He wasn’t good at all of these… social things. As much as he hid it behind smirks and teasing smiles, he really didn’t know how to interact with normal people. And even though Gon was different and bright and strong, and had so much potential that it was blinding, he was still just that, normal. A civilian. And a child at that. Killua didn’t know how to deal with that. Until now, Gon was the one to initiate conversation, while he mostly stayed silent and let the green-haired boy chatter away. Well, at least he was a good listener, he supposed. But now that he not only initiated the conversation but about feelings no less, he realized just how out of his depth he was. This was not an infiltration, not a mission, and he didn’t have a specific goal he had to reach. He didn’t have to talk circles around his friend and the lack of purpose made him slightly nervous. 

Gon, bless his heart, just blinked at him and smiled sheepishly. “Nah, everything’s fine, it’s just my number…” he rubbed his neck as he trailed off, eyes falling to the ground, not knowing exactly what to say. 

Killua raised an eyebrow, noting how Kurapika and Leorio glanced at Gon with open concern. It seems they don’t know anything either. He cocked his head to the side, like a curious bird, “Is it me? Or any of us?” He gestured to the two still standing silently next to Gon. 

At this, the boy’s head shot up, and he shook it violently. “No! No. Nothing like that. It’s just…” he scrambled for words again before silently holding out the number he pulled. 

44 

The same number that still adorns the chest of a jester with a too-wide smile and forever amused, yet sharp, eyes. 

“Ouch,” was all Killua had to say. Hisoka was one of the only people he would hesitate to actively target. If only in the name of self-preservation. As skilled and prodigious as he was, at twelve years of age he would not be able to defeat a man who, based on his aura, could probably rival his brother in strength. Of course, he could always try the assassin approach and try taking him out from the shadows but he doubts his chances even then. If nothing else, the Zoldyck training taught him how to not overestimate his power. Maybe in a couple of years… 

He shook his head like it could help him physically throw the thought out. It wasn’t the time to speculate. They didn’t have a couple of years. Gon had to face Hisoka today and if he was killed Killua would never get to see his endless potential realized. And that would truly be tragic. Such pure light snuffed out before he could see it grow. 

Kurapika and Leorio were speechless, not knowing what to say. They realized the amount of danger their new friend was in. 

The blond recovered first, “You know…” Kurapika began hesitantly, starring at Gon intently, “You don’t actually have to fight him, you could just steal his tag with your fishing road or something...” he trailed off uncertainty and Leorio nodded emphatically. Gon perked up at that, his face regaining some of his confidence. Then he smiled, and even though it wasn’t as bright as usual, it was grateful and honest. Killua had to blink a couple of times, for the first time seeing such a blatantly open expression on someone’s face. No reservations, no fear, no caution. It was… weird, to say the least. But in a good way.

Then the Zoldyck chuckled. He was right, this boy was definitely going to be interesting to watch. “Well, technically, you don’t even have to come close to the man. You can just collect three other tags and you’re golden.” Killua shrugged as he said that, that’s what he would have probably done if he was in Gon’s situation. 

But Gon already got out of the brief wave of depression at the task ahead and grinned at the silver-haired boy, his eyes bright and determined, “No, I’m gonna do this the right way. I am going to get Hisoka's tag even if it takes me the whole week!” He proclaimed loudly and pumped his fist in the air, all of a sudden looking excited. Killua did not know what to say. Was this bravery, stupidity, or did this guy want to attempt suicide by Hisoka? Kurapika was standing with a similar expression of dawning horror on his face, but then it turned resigned and he just shook his head and looked upwards, as if praying for strength. It almost made Killua giggle. Almost.

Leorio, on the other hand, had a lot to say and didn’t stop himself from speaking his thoughts, “Are you an idiot?! What do you think you can do against that creep? The guy is a goddamn monster! You will be dead in a ditch faster than you could say hunter!” he screamed, face red and furious. 

Gon quickly put his hands in front of him, grinning sheepishly as he tried to placate the still ranting man, “It’s fine Leorio, really. Hisoka is not going to kill me,” although he didn’t sound so sure about that last part.

After that, it was announced through the speakers that the boat had arrived and they went their separate ways, promising to meet after the week came to an end. 

When Killua’s number was called, he waved at Gon and the others before slowly making his way through the beach and into the forest. 

He didn't fully relax until he was securely covered in the lush greenery of the island. He walked with steady steps, moving deeper and deeper into the wildlife. Only when he was absolutely sure that there were no living creatures within a couple of hundred meters did he allow himself to relax. To consciously force his muscles to unlock one by one. To finally let go of the wrong posture and the somewhat rigid and awkward movements that helped him come out as somewhat skilled, but still just a teenager. Slowly, as Killua kept walking, his movement became fluid. He didn’t walk, he glided, every step was full of primal, predatory grace, filled with deadly intent. His posture straightened, and the half-formed smile dropped from his face. His eyes, now sharp and narrowed slightly, glinted dangerously in the light. 

The switch was flipped.

Killua Zoldyck, the heir apparent of the Zoldyck Family -unrivaled in its reputation as the best assassination group in the world for centuries- finally stepped in to join the game. 

-o0o-0o0-o0o-

Killua rolled his shoulders with a sigh. He was sitting in one of the huge trees of the forest. He looked down, feet dangling from the branch like an impatient child in a candy shop as he tracked the movement of his chosen target. His thoughts were clear for the first time in what felt like months. The switch was on, and Killua savored the feeling of clarity and freedom it offered. He kept it off for far too long when he was trained to have it on at all times. 

All this time, throughout his brief travels, he felt constricted, trapped, caged in a way that grated on his nerves. It not only set off all of his instincts but stomped all over them. 

But he managed. 

He had enough sense to weight till darkness overtook the sky. Midnight always had a calming effect on him.

And now, he was rewarded for his efforts. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. His eyes focused back on the target. His gaze was focused and predatory. He jumped slightly and crouched on the branch, blending with the shadows until he was barely visible. His whole body went still like a cobra getting ready for a strike.

His chosen target, a man in his thirties was just walking through the forest without a care in the world, occasionally looking around. Most likely trying to find another contestant to get some tags, he thought. The man was somewhat guarded but it seemed as if he was confident enough in his abilities to just walk out in the open like that. 

No matter, his skills -if he even has any- nothing would save him from a Zoldyck assassin after his head. 

For a second, Killua deliberated on what to do. On the one hand, he very much just wanted to throw one of his knives at the man and watch him bleed out slowly. On the other hand, it didn’t seem nearly personal enough to satisfy him after having to hold back for so long. 

In the end, he decided to play a little. 

Killua dropped to the ground, landing gracefully without making a sound right out of his target's sight. He slowly moved toward the man and stopped a couple of feet away from him. It took a couple of seconds, but eventually, the man noticed him. And sneered.

“What’s a kid like you doing’ here all alone, huh?” 

Killua hid a grimace. The malice and a sick kind of interest were written all over the man’s face as he moved forward slowly, trying to look intimidating, not caring that his target was a child barely thirteen years of age. He never liked these types of people. They crawled out of the nearest shithole and thought themselves kings. They were arrogant and acted as if the world owed them something. This man was just a brute, a thug arrogant enough to think himself skilled enough to become a hunter. 

Well, he thought, in a way, he would be doing the hunter association a favor, not allowing such a man to have even a chance of becoming one of the elites of this world. Such scum doesn’t deserve to live and contaminate the air. Sometimes he wonders why all people can’t just be useful members of society. But then again, if that happened, he would be out of a job. And that just won’t do. 

With that thought, Killua disappeared from his spot, moving so fast he was no more than a blur for normal. He reappeared in front of the man, a hand curling around his throat and cutting off the oxygen supply. His nails elongated and he curled his hand a little tighter, allowing the man to feel the sharpness of them. 

Killua looked into the struggling man’s eyes and said calmly, “Stop. If you move, you're dead.” The man obediently stopped his aborted movements and froze like a mouse before a snake, eyes wide and hands shaking. 

“You know,” Killua started conversationally, “it’s nothing personal. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. And I just needed someone to play with.” He grinned as the man’s eyes widened even more and he choked and struggled to get some air before slowly bringing up his free hand -with the claws already extended- and laying it over the man’s heart. Killua slowly pushed in, feeling as skin and then muscle ripped under his nails. He crushed bones easily with his unnaturally great strength and reached the heart. He uncurled his other hand just enough to hear the man scream before he curled his fingers around the frantically beating muscle and ripped it out. He watched as life slowly left his eyes.

He let the body fall to the ground as he stared at the still-beating heart in his hand. It spasmed a couple of times before finally stilling forever. 

The blood dripped from his fingers to the ground.

Pit pat. Pit Pat. Pit Pat.

His face rose to the sky, the moonlight catching the gloss of his silver-white hair.

Pit Pat. Pit Pat. Pit Pat.

A sigh of relief escaped his lips. A twist of the lips, not quite a smile twisted the corner of his mouth. 

He dropped the heart carelessly to the ground and brought his hand up to his mouth. Slowly, he trailed his tongue over one of his bloody fingers, and his eyes hooded in pleasure. 

He always loved blood -the life essence of all living beings. He had to constantly keep the urge to paint the walls red at bay. Especially any time he was in a large gathering of people. Killua didn’t like people, didn’t have a need for them. They were loud and stupid and annoying. It might have been growing up in a large empty mansion, with only his family and the servants who usually kept to themselves and out of the way. His family, who he mostly only saw during training or at dinner that they traditionally ate together. Only Illu-nii ever stayed with him. 

Illumi was the only one to show him patience, to show him kindness in his own twisted way. (After all, how could one who knows nothing about kindness show it to another being). His eldest brother was the only one who has ever seen Killua as a person, who acknowledged that he was a weapon and an heir but was also a person and therefore was not perfect. Illumi didn’t expect anything from him, and it was a reprieve from the stifling expectation that was placed on his shoulders along with the heavy title of the Zoldyck Heir. Instead, Illumi taught him. Guided him through problems and difficulties, helping when needed, trying and succeeding at making him stronger. The best. 

And even though Illumi’s methods were never nice and ever painless, Killua didn’t mind. The pain was nothing, it was easy to ignore after a while. Especially when he knew that his elder brother went through the same thing, that he suffered just the same. So he endured the torture, took the pain without a flinch, and just hugged his brother tightly afterward. Because what was pain to him if the only thing he was truly afraid of was the emptiness, the loneliness that consumed him and ate him up from inside. With his brother there, Killua could survive anything. 

And even though Killua left home, he knew, just as well as his whole family knew, that he would come back. And Killua knew that Illumi wouldn’t leave him alone. He might give him some time, but would never truly leave. And Killua loved him all the more for it. 

Killua knew he wasn’t all there in the head. He read enough psychology books to be intimately familiar with the way most humans thought. He realized that he didn’t quite fit. But that's alright. Because Zoldycks always treated sanity and rules in general as simple guidelines; amusing, but completely unnecessary. As long as he was stable and loyal to the family, no one truly cared if he was a murdering psychopath, they might even encourage it. 

“Rules are just helpful guidelines for stupid people who can’t make up their minds.”

His eyes flickered to the side as he slowly wandered towards a nearby stream. Or was it a pond? Anyway, he heard water nearby so he was headed there to get a little cleaned up before he could resume his hunt. 

He made a mess, needlessly. He liked the ripping through, the feel of warmth as it enveloped his fingers, his wrist, his arm. The power. The surge that accompanied the sound of death.

Death has many sounds. Some are harsh and loud, like screaming. Some were pathetic and puni like the begging from their lips. Some… his favorite, was soft and light, loving, like the whisper of breath across his face as he leaned in for the kill. Sometimes, he slows time, to relish the feeling, the heat, the sensuality of it all. 

“Man, not killing people is harder than I thought it would be.”  
o0o0o0o

Killua stretched out quite comfortably on a branch of another tree, looking for all to see like a sated cat. 

He sat at the base of a branch, leaning his back on the trunk. He was quite high up so there was no need to worry about someone noticing him. Trees were familiar. A perfect spot to observe from or just get comfortable when there is no opportunity to stay at an inn during missions.

Five days passed since the contestants were dropped on this island and Killua used that time to sate his bloodlust. To calm the need to spill blood and tear flesh. He wasn’t sure how many he killed but he was positive that no more than twenty people would leave this island. Maybe even less. He wasn’t the only one hunting, after all. Hisoka is sure to take his fill. 

He could only hope for Gon not to be one of the clown's victims.

He looked at the three random tags in his hands. The only reason he even remembered to collect them was another contestant trying to steal his. In the excitement, he forgot the objective. His face reddened slightly at the thought. He couldn’t believe that he got so carried away. That had not happened since he was like six! 

If Illumi-nii even found out he would never hear the end of it.

Killua sighed. Embarrassment aside, he got all the tags he needed and was satisfied with the blood he spilled in the process. The problem was he had nothing else to do! He had a whole two days and absolutely nothing to do. 

At first, he considered hanging out with Gon but when Killua found his new friend, from what he saw he was in the middle of some intense training. So Killua left him be.

So here he was, sitting in a tree with absolutely nothing to do!

He was whining, and he knew that. But at this point, he didn’t care. 

He supposed he could catch up on some sleep. If there was truly nothing for him to do then he could just go ahead and do nothing right? 

With that decided, the deadly assassin who murdered more than half the examinees spent the last two days of the test lazing around in trees like a particularly deadly cat.


End file.
